Your Child's First Job (aka "Where Did The Time Go?")

As my children grow older, I am now faced with a very different perspective on being a parent.  It’s a very odd feeling and I’m not entirely sure where I fit.  Am I parent or just a landlord? Do I offer advice or wait for them to ask?  Do I direct them or merely make suggestions? Put simply, it’s way more difficult than I imagined it would be.

For example, I am guilt ridden if dinner is not ready when my 18 year old gets home from work…..at 9:30 pm.  I constantly have to stop myself from texting if I have not heard from them for several hours.  I still do their laundry with mine and I still wash their dishes and pick up after them. 

Am I helping them or enabling them?

There is one area, however, in which I know I am right on track.  I walk the talk when it comes to the job hunting tips I share with you on this blog.  

I am am amazed at how many parents expect their children to somehow find a job when their kids don’t know the first thing about how or where to look!  The days of walking to the local gas station or fast food place and then getting hired on the spot are GONE!  I’m amazed at how many high schoolers are given dozens of hours of direction on how to find the right college, and little or NO direction on maneuvering the till-you-find-the-perfect-career point in their lives.

So, for all you parents out there, here are a few tips that will help you get focused, and get started, on helping your child find a job.

Focus, Focus, Focus –  WARNING:  This can be the hardest part. Ask yourself:  What are my child’s strengths and weaknesses that will help or hurt them on the job?  Are they sociable or introverted?  Do they have a driver’s license? If not, can I take them to and from work? Are there lots of opportunity in your town or will they be commuting to a larger, nearby, city? (Can they parallel park!?  EEK!) Are they organized and focused or scattered and require a lot of direction?  What are their long term goals and can those be applied to a short term, and/or part time, job? Are they ready to juggle school and a job?  Are both parents on board to support them in this endeavor?  Does my child know how to manage their money responsibly?

Until you can answer these questions, dare I say, that as a parent;

YOU are not ready for them to have a job!

 

Small Steps, Big Results – Once you’ve answered all of the tough questions, now it’s time for action.  Establish a generous timeline for finding a job.  It will be much easier to make progress if you devote a little time each week rather than a lot of time this week, and then none for weeks on end.  Determine exactly how much time will be spent each week devoted to the tasks of job searching, resume building, networking, and volunteering.  Gather all your child’s “tools”.

These may include, but are not limited to:  A resume, letters of recommendations, business cards, personal and/or volunteer reference list, social security card, driver’s license or state ID, food handlers card, casual business attire, and yes…….a new haircut.

OK, now put them all in one place / bin / shelf / cupboard / hiding spot / cubby.  Then, re-read my blog.  (yes, that was a not-so-veiled attempt at self-promotion)   If you don’t have your tools ready, your first few weeks will be spent gathering and/or perfecting them.  (Did I mention that this “project” may take weeks?)

 

Practice Till It Hurts! – While I would like to think that employers who hire students are going to be pretty patient when it comes to interviews, and will recognize if they are nervous, I’m not sure this is really the case anymore.  Nowadays, teens are competing for the same entry level jobs as adults are.  Even if the employer recognizes the student is nervous, they may see it as a negative reflection of their ability to listen, accept direction, and stay on task.  So, you need to practice job interviewing with your child.  Sit them down at the kitchen table.  Ask them all the questions you think they may be asked at an interview.  Yes, even the tough and open ended ones!  (“Tell me about yourself.” “Where do you see yourself in 5 years?” “Why do you want this job?” “Why should I give you this job?” “What skills do you have that will help you do this job?”)

 

Give your child feedback on how well they answered the questions.

Then…..you guessed it…….ask them again till they get it right.

Admittedly, all these tips all sound potentially stressful for both you and your growing teenager.  This is the main reason why you want and need to take your time.  It shouldn’t feel like a horrible chore that everyone avoids.  This process shouldn’t put undue stress on the child to “be perfect”.  (something my children have often told me that they I assume I expect of them)

If this all seems daunting, take a step back.  You can find opportunities to discuss job hunting when you’re out an about running errands together.  Ask them “Would you like to work here?”  It’s a good way to find out what their ideas are for a doable first time adventure into work land.

As parents we are tasked for preparing our children for the big wide world beyond our front door.  In today’s rough economy and job market it’s even tougher for inexperienced adults to launch into successful careers, and relationships.  Be empathetic, yet committed, to helping (or pushing) them to get to where they want to be……..even if they don’t know where that is.